I am in my 40’s and I am still painfully insecure. I ought to have grown out of that by now, right?
At a conference in early 2012, the opportunity presented itself for me to meet a young female entrepreneur who I admired online.
“Hi Maggie! I love your work and sense of style!”
Did I say this? No. I was too shy to introduce myself afraid of being rejected, so all I said was a timid “hello” and moved on.
A short while later I sat morosely kicking myself by this lovely fire. All my insecurities piled on me with a weight that grew heavier by the second. Instead of dealing with a mere moment of bashfulness, I was suddenly flooded with memories of a lifetime of missed encounters.
Do you ever do that?
I really never thought much about it until I saw how bothered my husband gets when I’m negative about myself. He loves me as I am and it’s insulting to his love for me when I insist that I’m unworthy of it.
I’m not alone here. I see other women I respect who don’t feel that they have much to offer and, while it’s easy for me to perceive the lie of satan in their lives, I’m blind to it in my own.
But we are women made in the image of God.
We are chosen by God for eternity.
Jesus gave up his life for us on the cross.
We are his Beloved.
I don’t have an answer to fix my own insecurities or yours. But I know that we should not dwell on them or let them drag us down and keep us from becoming all we can be in Christ. I know that God uses our weaknesses as opportunities for his strength to shine through. As Paul says, in 2 Corinthians 12:
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
I hope to offer you some encouragement tonight. Whatever it may be that you are beating yourself up about, stop. See that God is at work through you. That where you feel like you fail is where he steps in and shows his strength and power through you. And if you’re struggling and just can’t see that, then know. Know that his grace is sufficient for you and that he is with you. Trust his word. Believe it.
You, and I, have so much more to offer. Our insecurities and weaknesses are shining the light of God’s strength to a darkened world.
I’m continuing to count the gifts God is giving me:
- Jewel-toned colors through a stained glass window.
- The warmth of a purring cat.
- Sunshine and warmer than average days in January.
- A peace that descends as notes reverberate through a piano.
- Chocolate. 🙂
- Sunset darkening the sky a little later each day as winter ebbs slowly into spring.
I’m linking up with: